Sexing Up Jesus

As we journey on our first installation of “The Uglyside of Church” we begin with “Sexing Up Jesus,” a future book to be pinned by myself. Yes, for a multiplicity of reasons local churches are afraid to talk about sex, especially to singles. Some ministries don’t mind alluding to it often for married couples, because according to Scripture those are the only ones who should be having it. Not to mention, all the sexual sins that are actually within marriage, such as acts practiced by homosexuals like oral and anal sex. So the married aren't in the clear, either.

But society begs to differ. We know singles are probably having much more sex than married couples. We're bombarded with this "if it feels good, do it" mentality. And many local churches want to desperately reach society or fit in with it, so they simply oblige to the cultural norm. You know, they want to be relevant and cutting edge. Now no one is knocking relevancy, but what’s more relevant in modern day than the issue of sex. Sexual innuendos are often used to sell anything from toothpaste to Gatorade, bubble gum to deoderant. The sex industry is nearly a $100 billion business annually. And church conferences usually lead the way for pornography pay-per-view channel subscriptions, within hotels and motels. When we see a male feministic-choir-director or over sensitive worship leader, what usually comes to mind? Or, how many people in your church are shacking up together, unmarried but freely having sex with their so called "partner?" The proof is in the pudding and track records of behavior rarely ever lie.

So why are churches so closed-minded about this issue? The concern may lie with the uglyside of church. One of the top reasons, over recent years, for pastoral failures has been infidelity; a leading cause of local church splits as well. Many Christian men and women are addicted in one form or another to sex; even the author of this blog isn’t exempt. Presently, I live in Atlanta which is one of the leading cities in the nation for homosexual pastors and churches. It’s also the headquarters for Exodus International, a leading organization in America helping Christians break free from homosexuality.

So again, why aren’t local churches addressing this issue more? Maybe it’s too painful, shameful of an issue to deal with. Could it be that pastors and leaders don’t want their own dirt and addictions within this area exposed. But I heard a minister say,

“We’re only as sick as our secrets!”

And the symptoms of sexual secrets are abundant, leaving us gravely ill. The illnesses may be seen as emotional baggage, sleepless nights due to sexual discontent, extreme pornographic addiction, lustful soap opera and romance novel fanaticism, etc. Our faculties are affected in numerous ways: emotionally, psychologically, physically, and even vocationally. So full fledged ministry doesn’t exempt us from addressing the secrets within ourselves. Still, there are many things we need to do for “real freedom.”

For starters, we should at least stop ignoring the pink elephant in the room–sex. It’s all over: television, songs, peer pressure, comedy shows, at the office, and in the church. Secondly, we need to deal with it; and I mean deal with it seriously. Jesus, Paul and others made no bones about that. A healthy place to start is with your own heart, getting out of denial and thinking you’re squeaky clean. Here is a resource that can help immensely (click on the broadcast "Recovering from False Intimacy"). Thirdly, you should intentionally get around better people who aren’t so sexually-driven. This list can go on and on. But instead of getting overwhelmed, just get started with the first thing. God is more than willing and able to give us victory in this area. All we need to do is be real, surrender and let Him do it.

The Uglyside of Church

In the coming weeks we will be embarking on this thought: "The Uglyside of Church." Many see the Church as a wonderful group of believers who exemplify the love of God, and rightfully so. But this concept usually fails to resonate well over to the local concept of church. The local church is not the best example of Jesus representatives. There are differences in denominations, gender aspects, socioeconomic backgrounds, weekend escapades, partiality, smugness, etc. Over time, we'll find that many of these aspects are extremely ugly and only God can tear these down, bringing real beauty to a church so in need of it.    

Some Youthful Hope

For everyone who has exhausted you with statistics on how our youth are in a hopeless state of mind, that's not the end of the story. For everyone who has promoted more prisons being built and youth centers closing, there's a clear understanding that the reverse is more beneficial for society. And for the people constantly counting this generation of young people out from putting their mark on the world, making it a better place, then think again.

In our 3rd installation of the Hope Series, we maneuver around the country in order to see "some youthful hope." If this doesn't make you feel like there's still hope for our youth, I don't know what else will.

(Click on the color labels in order to see the links & videos)


1. Eddie James & Dream Life - Hamilton, AL


2. YMAD - Salt Lake City, UT


3. Lift Communities/ 
    LIFT- Washington, D.C.


4. Westhill High - Stamford, CT


5. YAGA Program - San Antonio, TX

Sin Is Never On $ale...!

On last week or so, it was my hope that you all got your pick-me-up grove on from these songs. As we continue to embark on the Hope Series, we go into the 2nd installment - Sin is Never on $ale. You won't necessarily find it marked down at Macy's or your favorite boutique. It's not in a buy one get one free package; it's ridiculously expensive. If sin was a watch it wouldn't be a Casio, nor would it even be a Movado or Rolex. Sin would be a Piaget, Franck Muller or Cartier which can carry up to a multi-million dollar price tag.

Now I do realize when someone converses about sin, many tend to get all antsy, quickly offended and overly defensive. But here within this post, we'll seek to get you off of your high horse while simultaneously getting you away from walking on eggshells. In other words, you can relax and look at the bigger picture. One we all may be facing, and not just yourself. So put your defensive guard down for a moment, and try to listen from a general perspective, not just a personal one.

There's really no need to hash out the numerous vices found under the category of sin. Sin is what it is. You can look here for more of it's religious, traditional details. In simple verbiage, it's continual wrongdoing. We can sit up here all day and argue over right and wrong, asking "What constitutes wrongdoing?" Admittedly or unadmittedly, within each one of us is a moral barometer that is fairly universal in nature. We all have at least some agreed understanding of sin, which crosses culture, race or religion.

On a smaller scale, sin can keep you living life with a tedious struggle over your selfish human nature and a more loving one. On a larger scale, it can ruin your career, reputation and livelihood leading to murder or physical imprisonment. Regardless, we can all agree with the notion that sin cost. And it's definitely not cheap! It has devastated families, tainted legacies.

Okay. So what's new, sin is still sin. It's detrimental and problematic; blah, blah, blah.

But for the Christian, there's hope. Especially in the area of sin's cost, we don't have to keep trying to pay for that heavy cost. As cliche as it may sound, Jesus paid for the heavy cost of sin. And that cost is unforgiveness coupled with eternal death. It's like having a huge iodine, blood or ketchup stain on your favorite, expensive outfit. As much as you seek to hand wash it, if the stain is locked into the fabric, it's not coming out. But how about this? Many of us aren't even trying to wash it out. Rather we're expecting it to automatically go away by osmosis, being in denial that it's even messing up the appearance of our outfit. Others clearly see the stain but agree with your denial, hoping you don't reveal to them their own huge spot on their own outfit.

The old sentiment goes like this:

 "Sin will take you further than you want to go, keep you longer than you want to stay, and cost you more than you are willing to pay."

Thankfully, Jesus brought hope in the form of the ultimate stain remover. But in this case, the huge stain is not on your outfit, it's within your heart and soul. It's within mine. And Jesus' removal fee is free of charge, find out here. Acclaimed rapper Da' Truth said it like this, "Sin cost me but I ain't have it in the budget. But I paid for it though; I paid with my joy. I paid with my peace, and a boatload of trouble." Below is his song with this concept, listen to the lyrics.

HOPE Series: 12 Pick-Me-Up Songs

Many people are constantly looking for a pick-me-up. Be it a cafe in the morning or a bar in the evening, we all look for something to ease our moods. We desire something that will lift our spirits, while living in a world of turmoil. Often times, it's not in the little 5-hour energy bottle or online dating scene. Nor is it usually found in the night clubs on the weekend or days off from work. Yet, the simplest forms of major relief can be found in one single word: HOPE. This doesn't necessarily mean one's situation has dramatically changed. But rather one's perspective has done all the changing. You begin to see things, not just how they are but, how they could and should be. It caters well with the glass-half-full philosophy. And a great way to initiate it is through music. Music somehow places individuals in an emotional moment where nothing else matters, but that moment. Life is at ease and a better day is on the horizon. Here are a few musical renditions that do that very thing for me; maybe, they'll do it for you too.  

Check these out! (Click on the colorful word labels for listening/viewing:)


1.) Hopeful by Twista feat. Faith Evans... A flavorful pick-me-up

2.) I Will Rise by Chris Tomlin... An eternal perspective pick-me-up

3.) God is Truly Amazing by Deniece Williams... An amazing God pick-me-up

4.) How He Loves Us by Jesus Culture feat. Kim Walker... A ridiculously loved by God pick-me-up

5.) Unbreakable by Alicia Keys... A marriage pick-me-up

6.) Didn't You Know by Donnie McClurkin... A with you always, reassuring pick-me-up

7.) Summertime by DJ Jazzy Jeff & the Fresh Prince... A summer's coming soon pick-me-up

8.) Hero by Mariah Carey... A motivational pick-me-up

9.) U Saved Me by R. Kelly... A 2nd chance given pick-me-up

10.) Golden by Jill Scott... A freedom pick-me-up

11.) There's Hope by India Arie... A hopeful gratitude pick-me-up

12.) You Gotta Be by Des'ree... A stout determination pick-me-up



Do you have any pick-me-songs that encourage you in a time of need?

If so, what are your 12?

Where's HOPE When You Need It?

Even on our desired days off, we usually still hear bitterness, guile and hatred spew out of the mouths of numerous individuals. It's a daily basis kind of thing that makes it hard to relax while watching television. If you don't believe me, just tune into one of your 24-hour news networks---anchors will be screaming political ideology from Fox News Channel about how the democrats are left-winged jerks, godless liberals and out-of-touch with reality; or from MSNBC anchors' jargon will give way to republicans being identified as right-winged hypocrites, inconsiderate conservatives and greedy idiots. And that's negativity all day, not even counting the late-breaking horror-stories of crime coming from your area's local news station.

If that wasn't enough, try turning the channel to check out dysfunctional relationships: from the fights on Jerry Springer to the affairs and promiscuity on soap operas. Hit the clicker one more time, you may garner the privilege of being privy to some sort of new scandal in the world of sports: assistant coach molest little boys, athlete cheats on his wife with multiple partners or organization runs three-year bounty scheme.

So you wisely turn off the tube. Enough is enough. You're drained, not relaxed at all, feeling mentally exhausted, discouraged and in the dumps. But wait! We haven't even gotten to your actual life. On tomorrow, you may have to head back to work. You wake up early the next morning, shower, get dressed, grab some coffee and head off into hideous traffic. For some apparent reason, deadlines have been pushed up and your body is still sleepwalking. Your boss isn't the greatest. Most of your coworkers love to gossip, constantly complain and work your last nerve. After this, you still have to go back home.

Unfortunately, your place of residence is no oasis. After dealing with some more hideous traffic, you pull into the driveway. On your way to the mail box, you step into some dog dung. While wiping your shoes on the grass as well as checking the mail, you notice it's filled with increasing bills. Eventually, you walk into the front door. The house is loud, messy, children are running a muck, a migraine is quickly coming on and in order to get some type of relief you flop on the sofa, turning on the television. And you start to realize this is feeling so similar to your day off, all over again, but even worse. You wonder what can get you out of this rut, this cycle---new found fame, a vacation, hitting the lottery, a perfect spouse or a new career.

Sadly, this is a normal day in the lives of many individuals on the planet. And this is referring to most individuals living the so called "good life." A life consisting of one having a decent job, a home, a vehicle, a family, a dog, etc. Now if this is a seemingly goodlife, what about added problems to the equation? What if you get fired, your health starts failing, children get suspended, etc...? If you're struggling to hold it together when things are "normal," you'll simply fall apart at the sign of any major problem.

Fortunately for you, there's HOPE! Some people would like to know, "Where's hope when you need it?" When normality seems so crazy having you going in every wrong direction possible. Bad decision after bad decision, life turning your world upside down. Well, the next few blog posts will seek to give you some hopeful hiding places away from that type of normality.

What does normality look like for you, is it similar to this post or even worse?

Where have you found everyday HOPE, and how difficult was it to find?

Expect the BEST but Prepare for the WORST

It has to be a consistent thought-process for individuals this year to do 2 key things:

(i) Expect the BEST

(ii) Prepare for the WORST

Let's dive right into addressing both of these concepts---

Do we usually expect the best in life? Or do we resent our lives? Expecting the best for one's life has much to do with attitude and perspective. If one is filled with a motivated attitude, they will expect the best out of life. They will focus on the colorful rainbow coming in radiantly after the rain, rather than on the rain itself. Their attitude would be one of gratefulness instead of misery, even with misery all around them. These are the motivators, encouragers and gregarious individuals in life. These are the ones who have the "it" factor as it relates to enthusiam and vigor.

But many of these individuals usually end up having the right perspective in life as well. "Life is what you make of it." Life isn't a pie-in-the-sky journey that has no problems along the way. So their perspective is important to that understanding. They don't often depend on people to lift their spirits and make them joyful. In turn, they tap into the joy laying dormant with inside of themselves. They use their optimistic perspective to light the match of potential, leading to ongoing cheerfulness.

Now, these individuals seem to good to be true; they seem a bit out of touch with reality. One can see how someone can think that. But there is a remedy for that conception. This leads right into the next concept.

They must also prepare for the worst. Notice, one didn't say they should believe for the worse, only prepare for it. Some get this confused with suddenly converting to now a pessimist. No, one must stay optimistic, not just positive but actually optimistic. Positivity centers merely on thought; optimism revolves around intents and actions. One shouldn't just think great things can happen today, but one should be positioning themselves to literally walk in those great things.

In preparing for the worst, step-by-step praticality comes into play. So instead of just believing for a raise at work, one also places money away in savings or to the side. This is not done to disregard the anticipation of the raise; it is an added piece in connection with the raise. And in the end, the person has a boat load of money put away in savings that year and/still with the hopes of a raise. This could be the same for healing/healthy living, business start-ups/more professional schooling, etc. Sadly, individuals who tend to struggle on multiple occasions with this dilemma are Christians. They tend to often look to one point or the other, and not both. Both are needed for a healthy balance in trusting God as well as preparing for the realities of life. The more we implement both of these, the better off we can be. 

Multiple Opportunities for Growth...

It should be no surprise that we all can GROW. Actually, we all must grow. And I mean grow a lot! Especially, in the area of spiritual growth is where much of the work is needed. We all can become better at multiple things. You can do more and be more. Here is a list of 25 opportunities that may help your spiritual growth spurts:

1.) Reaching out to the hurting, broken and rejected
2.) Using Godly wisdom
3.) Walking in love more consistently
4.) Handling our finances better
5.) Studying the Bible more frequently, instead of sometimes simply reading it like a novel
6.) Assisting those with physical, spiritual, mental and emotional needs
7.) Organizing our time more efficiently
8.) Not being stressed out so easily
9.) Running after God
10.) Valuing our relationships properly
11.) Supporting our children & loved ones
12.) Aiding the poor (only the ones truly needy, not the scammers)
13.) Giving a listening ear to the elderly
14.) Being more effective in ministry
15.) Preparing more soundly for our endeavors
16.) Witnessing with more intentionality
17.) Praying more fervently
18.) Fasting more
19.) Being less self-centered, demanding my own way
20.) Being less prideful, and more humble
21.) Being less stubborn, and more flexible
22.) Checking our ugly attitude at the door
23.) Being more patient
24.) Holding onto our peace
25.) Refusing to relinquish our joy by remaining grateful 

Disappointments & Rewards

Over time, most in life will experience some type of setback or disappointment. You know, the plans don't always go quite as planned. The rejection of a marriage proposal or on a job interview, that could be a major disappointment. The failure of a business/financial risk as well as failing to get accepted into a major college, these can also be disappointing. Your family, children or friends can let you down at the time you most need them. What a disappointing experience to have to deal with any of these... Disappointment can seem like it's forever, but it's NOT. 

Unsuprisingly, this is basically a part of life. To put it bluntly, "Stuff happens!" And not always the good kind of stuff. Romans 8:28 reminds us---that it can work together for our good. And not that it will often feel, look or be good.

But there's nothing more disappointing than feeling like the local church or even God has let you down. Sometimes it may seem like you have let yourself down too many times, based on the devastating choices you chose. One can eventually get stuck in a rut of disappointment. You can start to believe "this is just the way life is for me. I get little to know breaks and I'm destined for disappointment." Believe me friend, I've BEEN there, too many times than I would care to admit. What's reassuring is the fact that I don't have to LIVE or STAY there.

Thankfully, every cloud has a silver lining, and there is sunshine after the rain.

Inspirational communicator Les Brown said it like this:

"Anytime you suffer a setback or disappointment, put your head down and plow ahead."

What was understood is that, "There are rewards up ahead..." Again, disappointment isn't always forever. Your joy can be in knowing: this will all change some day. It could be a lot sooner than later. It could even be here in 2012. Don't blame God, pray for your local church along with its leaders and refuse to get too down on yourself. Remember, rewards are on the way! 

Challenges & Wonders

2012, some have already seen this year immediately leading in one direction or another---challenges or wonders. Of course, we all would prefer the delightful wonders. Everything in life being just as blissful as it can possibly be. A "no worries" state of mind where days are just fine and dandy, a breeze. Like the Christmas movie---It's a Wonderful Life, angelic George Bailey comes in and saves the day. Work is a dream job, plenty of money's in the bank, bills are paid weeks-to-months in advance, relationships are lovingly intimate, children are amazingly cooperative and even the dog is tailwaggingly well-behaved. Ahhh, those are the days...! 

But is that usually the reality for most people? Or are those extremely rare days? And I do mean extremely...! Over the course of being just a little past a couple weeks in the year, I can attest with conviction, challenges have already creeped into 2012. That dream job is still placed on hold, money concerns have already arisen, relationships are tense, children are seemingly losing their minds and the dog refuses to shut-up much of the night.

Yeah, I thought I would start to get some more of your attention by now! And snap you out of the fairytale ending of your life. The second scenario could be much more of what you're experiencing early in 2012. But rest in knowing a few things:

1. You're NOT alone...!

2. Life is a journey...so when you get an opportunity, stop and smell the roses.
3. Remember, challenges are a part of life.
4. Learn to GROW in the midst of challenges.
5. The BEST you is still on the horizon.
6. While you're going through what you're going through, help somebody else in need.
7. And, last but not least, let God lead your heart, words and actions...He's still in control. 

Trust vs. Superstition

Again, to all, "Happy New Year!" I do realize this year will bring challenges and wonders. I do realize this year will bring disappointments and rewards. And I also realize this year will bring multiple opportunities for growth. Regardless what this year brings, one should be prepared. So it's perfectly okay to..."expect the best but prepare for the worst." Each highlighted scenario, we will be addressing throughout this month. But on this present occasion we will address the case of trust vs. superstition.

What is trust? What is trust in God? How can I operate in more trust in God? What is superstition? Why do people operate in superstition? Is it okay for Christians to be superstitious? Many of these questions may be complex in their origin and understanding. And some may not be able to be adequately answered in this blog post. But the overall concept to these questions can be quickly answered.

Here are the quick answers:

Trust, according to Merriam-Webster, is assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something. Notice, it is not preferenced by feelings or emotions but rather character. Trust in God, it is placing full assurance in His character (what He's consistently known for doing throughout history). It's not based on guessing or wishing but guaranteed, full assurance. Trusting God more, it is based on getting to know Him more. Getting to know His character and consistency, it is not based just on knowing about God but rather knowing God, personally.

On the other hand, superstition is a belief in supernatural causality: that one event leads to the cause of another without any process in the physical world linking the two events. It is based solely on folk tales, myths, luck, guesses, feelings and emotions. But, similar to trust, a full assurance of belief is placed in those things. For example, today is Friday the 13th, a so called unlucky number. So now luck is the driving force to their belief instead of God. Many people are highly superstitious because they either don't personally know God, or have a dubious relationship and are keenly lacking in their trust in Him. As for Christians being very superstitious, in a nutshell, it's not okay. These individuals should know God. But unfortunately, many don't! Instead, some of them just only know about God. So when it comes to direction for their lives; they look to the horrorscopes, are fearful by their surroundings and hold onto doubtful superstitions as valid truth. Sadly, the power and presence of God in their lives is limited to a Sunday morning ritual or nightly prayer routine passed on by family and friends.

The point of it all is this: if one can be superstitious; one can place trust in God. Both are based on full assurance. It's just that with superstition, the full assurance is placed in the wrong thing. Loved ones, let's trust more (in God) for 2012 and be very superstitious a lot less.

The Respect Series 12: "The Anti-Factor"

Well, well, well...it looks as if we're at the onset of concluding another year. A year to be grateful for the ups and even the downs. A year to love more, live more, and serve God more faithfully. And of course, a year to ring in the culmination of many things. In this case: the ringing in of "The Respect Series" as an array of blog-posts.

But there's still one last factor to address; one last post to write. This is the post I knew I couldn't avoid: "The Anti-Factor." So if one should consider doing away with all the preconceived notions of respect in this world, does that mean one should go after a life of welcoming disrespect as the ultimate means to respect? Should you hate anyone who doesn't agree with your opinion or value your perspective? Should you seek to be at odds with the thug, wealthy, happily married, overwhelmingly talented, seemingly religious, most popular, extremely athletic, elderly, handicapped, etc?

Unfortunately, many hear questions like these and mistakenly answer, "YES!" Being a loner is their cup of tea and anything the world praises they're in opposition to. That's right, they're anti. They're anti-establishment, anti-success, anti-love, anti almost everything. Most are even anti-God. My heart goes out to these individuals deeply. And to my dismay, a lot of them are young, way too young to be spiteful with their life and the life of anyone else.

If you go into the Hot Topic retail store in a mall, you'll see many of them purchasing their anti-fashion full of pictures of death, skulls and bones. Some even label themselves as Gothic, identifying with the Goth Subculture which is based on sexually-explicit, grudge rock music mixed with horror.

Many feel hopeless, with no voice and are too welcoming to suicide, hate and even murder (Columbine & Red Lake High Schools and the Dawson College killings, just to name a few). Many video games, movies and science-fiction novels are influenced by this culture. As I submit this post, the numer one film in the world is a goth-related production: Twilight - a vampire tale of youngsters which in its first installation has grossed over $1 billion at the box office alone.

Okay, so what am I getting at? Many of these "youths" (dressed in their black leather with black boots and black makeup) just want to be loved, valued and appreciated. Underneath all that black stuff are gorgeous individuals, who are usually as beautiful on the inside as they are on the outside (when given a chance to truly be heard). They want their voice heard and resent the fact that their voices are crowded out due to all the other voices the world so keenly respects. After all, their voice tends to be one of the ones MOST disrespected. But if society won't reach out to them, JESUS WILL! So let's come together as Christians and represent Jesus well by loving all, even the ones we may not fully understand and have difficulty respecting. At least let's give their hurting hearts a voice, and let them know that God is listening. He SO GREATLY loves them all, enough to die on their behalf.

HAPPY NEW YEAR! And may WE ALL continue to grow in the area of respect...!

The Respect Series 11: "The Sympathy Factor"

Whoa, poor _____! How will they be able to make it, after such a loss, or this situation? Many times, words like these are often muttered by sympathizers. These are the individuals who wish to respect or support you, based on your series of unfortunate events: the loss of a loved one, during the fight against a deadly disease, or some other major adversity faced.

But instead of respecting these individuals because one feels sorry for them, you can aid them in their need. Here are some examples:

For the elderly individual --- help them pay for their medicine or be that listening ear, providing hope and encouragement, to a lonely soul.

For the physically challenged/handicapped individual --- help them with medial services like getting dressed, play and eating. More importantly, try assisting those who are called to take care of these individuals.

For the individual who has just experienced a loss --- help them with chores around the home, babysitting children or finding new ways of moving on.

This list could go on and on for the: homeless, drug addict, individual with full blown AIDS, excon, someone presently incarcerated, ones in extreme poverty, the starving, the unemployed, the grossly uneducated, the single-parent, etc.

Instead of just respecting these individuals out of sympathy, how about you truly try getting to know them? Better yet, why don't you seek to love them and even learn to appreciate them? Sadly, many Christians could care less about many of these individuals! Just as long as me, my four and no more are okay, I'm fine and everything's just dandy. But many are physically dying all around you, and also spiritually dying as well. They have came to the belief that no one really cares, about them for that matter.

For some apparent reason, "the light bulb of care" doesn't seem to go off until it hits home. When YOU are the one going through the pain and crisis, suddenly it's a major crisis that needs immediate attention. When it's your family member dying or your spouse being wrapped with depression, all of the sudden it's a matter of life and death and everyone around you, in your circle of influence and your city need to get on board. Matthew 7:12 and Luke 6:31 makes it clear that this type of attitude should extend so far beyond your family, friends and relatives. But "a respectful heart of sympathy" should extend to others you encounter in one form or another.

Remember, selfishness and sympathy usually never go together!

The Respect Series 10: "The Talent Factor"

I am by no means "a television buff" but am aware of some of the programs out there, from commercials coming on in the middle of sporting games I view. There are three shows I continue to see advertised: America's Got Talent, Dancing with the Stars and The X Factor. I have never actually seen any of these shows, but one thing is certain. There is a high stakes on viewing talent. Whether someone is singing, dancing or a combination of the two, we want to see that talent displayed.

I've already mentioned my fascination for sports. But why such a fascination with balls, fields, hoops, tracks, rackets, bats, etc? Well, it's not about any of those things as much as it's about the astounding talent. Numerous others like myself want to see spectacular talent at least every weekend. That's why billions are spent annually on sports with people filling stadiums, purchasing jerseys or tailgating.

The better the talent, the better the chances are for a seemingly well off life. See, most people overwhelmingly LOVE the quintessential star. A rising-professional athlete is mainly known as one with a life filled with good living. Money galore, praise abundant and MAJOR RESPECT are the norm for most top notch athletes. But why? Why is an athlete so widely respected? It's not like they're all saving lives, repetitively ministering hope or revolutionizing this world for God's glory. They're just simply PLAYING a sport. The same goes for an actor or artist; they're not doing anything super special as it relates to the grand scope of things in the world.

Instead most teachers, firefighters, policemen and pastors wish they could be respected with at least half of the respect of top-tier athletes and actors. Many would feel so blessed to gain just some of that recognition. But they as well as ourselves should realize that living for the accolades of people is not a healthy goal. People are fleeting and fickled; they love you today and turn their backs on you tomorrow. If you don't believe me, just ask the star athlete or actor who has regressed in their performance or production. Suddenly, their fans agree in unison, "Next, c'mon let's do away with them and look for the next best thing coming."

Even Jesus can assist us in identifying with that disappointing feeling. He was gloriously praised on Thursday and painfully crucified on Friday. For those who may have outstanding talent, or their opposite counterparts who are much less talented, to put it kindly. Know that you are blessed, special and can rest in the talent and power of Jesus. He wants to work in you and through you, where He gets ALL the glory. God doesn't just only want the best ability but total availability. EFFORT matters with Him much more than just talented results. Contemporary Christian singer Rachael Lampa said it best in one of her old hits: "I AM BLESSED... Oh Lord, for all the worse and all the best, I am blessed!"

The Respect Series 9: "The Fashion Factor"

Bill at time of checkout: $30 for a bra, $300 for a pair of shoes, $3,000 for a bracelet, and $30,000 for an evening dress with matching shawl laced with 1/2 cut diamonds. It seems ridiculous, doesn't it? Nearly $35,000 spent on 1 outfit to be used for only 1 evening. Again, it seems ridiculous, doesn't it? How about I add the fact that the purchaser has a salary of $75,000, is in debt from student loans, have a mortgage payment of $2,500, and car payment of $500. Is it still ridiculous? How about I say the purchase is for their wedding day on tomorrow. Suddenly, the purchase is now seemingly justified...and the check is comfortably written. Wow!

Let's try this on for size. If I say, "An elegant texture with refined faux, touch of cowhide laces and shiek but chic looping brooch." Who would have known that I was referring to a designer belt. I can tell the truth, I wouldn't have even known. Well, what about when we hear names like Saks, Bergdorf Goodman, Prada, Burberry, Jimmy Choo, Chanel, Vera Wang, Salvatore Ferragamo, and MIU MIU? To be frankly honest, I would nearly be just as lost as I was with the belt scenario. But much of the nation in general would know about all of those names in some manner or another. And the fashion industry, media circuits, or luxury community would make sure you're privvy to many of those names and more. The fashion industry has their own language that the masses, surprisingly, understand. Not only do they understand this language, but they validate so many others by it.

I can remember growing up in grade school and hearing children taunt one another over their fashion. "Whoa, your shoes are bobos...Those aren't Nikes, they're Mike's!" or "Girl, who did your makeup? It's tore up from the floor up!" Children were so cruel in those days, targeting many times the fashion of their peers. Many believe, today's children are even worst! So, if I didn't want to get made fun of, I had to beg my parents, sneak designer clothes from my older siblings or try to work a minimum wage job at a young age. Tough times I tell you, tough times! But why? Why was there such an elite significance placed on designer clothes?

Actually, the significance wasn't placed on the clothes as much as it was placed on the name on the clothes. Then, why was the name important? Well, the name really wasn't important either. For all we know, some of those individuals could have been killers, bigots, thieves, snobs, etc. Eventually, what I learned over time was that the name wasn't the significant or important thing. The primary focus was on the name's affluence level. People usually identified the brands with affluence. Even if you weren't rich, at least, you could feel like you were. Better yet, you would even get respected like the rich get respected, seemingly. Herein lies a problem.

Value and respect, in this essence, is based on something fleeting, something material, someone mainly given worth due to their income or inheritance---someone RICH. For many of us, we're no longer in grade school. Thus, we shouldn't be acting like children. Let's grow up! Let's stop seeking to identify with a cultural norm that only respects you for your social class or income level. Or, in this case, your fashion... and let's look to be respected for who we are, not so much what we have or where we seem to stand in society.

The Respect Series 8: "The Civil/Patriot Factor"

For the common individual, respect is often given to those we are most proud of. This can range from our great grandparents all the way down to our children. But this type of respect is usually fleeting and fickled. The moment they tick you off, or you find out about something shamefully detrimental in their past, all of that admiration suddenly goes out the window. On the contrary, there are certain individuals we give a much longer lasting since of dignity to. Interestingly, their not that much different from the aforementioned individuals, like great grandparents and children. Many of these individuals have seemingly earned respect on an ongoing basis, no matter what! They will never lose it all, regardless of what they do. Also, this is usually based on one event or concept. But the commitment from that event or concept goes on for nearly a lifetime.

See, that's exactly it --- the COMMITMENT!

This is why we can continually give honor to those who fought in the 'Civil Rights Movement.' Their life before or even after that movement could be anything other than honorable and civic. But we don't even begin to attempt to discredit them (or their legacy) for their mishaps and failures. And neither should we!

Likewise, similar to notable civic leaders, patriots are given a pass for their unjust involvment in countless wars and the carrying out of unethical or unpopular policy. Except for the unjust disdain for the Veitnam War which was not highly appropriate, those men shouldn't have taken the brunt of the blame. Also, many argue that disdain was not so much targeted toward the Vets but rather the American government, once everything was said and done. Anyway, the soldiers or individuals laying their lives down for our nation are STILL greatly respected.

So what's the point I'm getting at? Well, the point is this: individuals involved in ministry or the work of the Gospel rarely ever get a justifiable pass, even when needed. They are respected within the perimeters of the church only, and that varies from local church to local church. Rarely are they ever respected out of it, once they fall. And condemningly, the world kicks them hard while they're down on a continual basis. Unfortunately, nowadays, so does the church! Now I'm not only talking about leaders, pastors or bishops. I'm referring to you and I as well. Sadly, when Christians fail, and we all do daily in some sort of way, we are the bud of every joke. We are disrepected on all accounts. You know the popular word we tend to be known by --- HYPOCRITS!

My prayer is that this unbelieving world would start to, at least, see Christians for who they are as individuals. That's right, we are still INDIVIDUALS. We are individuals who are called to make a difference in this world for God's glory, not necessarily to be perfect individuals who are super-faultless. Yes, Christians ought to seek to do and be better. But we also are to let others know we're strongly seeking to do that and not individuals who always get it right all the time, or the first time around for that matter. We should still be given, the same bit of respect civil leaders and patriots are given for our continued sacrifice, just like theirs. And let's be about lifting up others while their down, instead of kicking them hard, permanently wounding our brothers and sisters in Christ.

5 After 7

Believe it or not, 'The Respect Series' is not over. Yes, it was supposed to end at the 7th factor---"The Holy Factor." But it's definitely not over! To your surprise and mine, the series continues with, not 1 but, 5 more posts. Therefore, it looks as if we'll be communicating about this, in detail, until the end of the year --- 2011. The posts are as follows:

* The Civil/Patriot Factor

* The Fashion Factor

* The Talent Factor

* The Sympathy Factor

* The Anti-Factor

Of course, this will make 12 factors in total instead of the perceived 7. Twelve is not necessarily a bad number. After all, these are the amount of disciples Jesus truly chose. Also, this is the number of months in a full year. And so on and so forth. So twelve does work pretty well. If I decide to go pass twelve, "Someone please stop me!" Enough already; by now, you all should begin to understand where your respect should and should not lie. It definitely shouldn't lie in many of the things we so overwhelmingly over-value. God, and God alone is due our ultimate respect --- fear, devotion, honor, passion, hope, idolization, and love.

The Respect Series 7: "The Holy Factor"

Now, this may rub some Christians the wrong way. If you can, focus on the point of the message and hear God's heart within the matter. Instead of looking at me or yourself, let us both seek to clearly look at and listen to God. With that said and with no further ado, God wants holiness to come forth through our lives. But he wants HIS VERSION of holiness to come forth and not our own. In Leviticus 20:26 and I Peter 1:16 God desires for us to be holy, EVEN AS He is holy.

Holiness is based upon His standard and on His terms. And we CANNOT meet His standard of holiness apart from Jesus' sacrifice on the cross for our sins. Therefore, we should STOP trying to become something we already are.

You're not trying to become holy, you're already holy..., so just be yourself---the real you that is, according to I Corinthians 5:17. Easier said than done, hummm! Why?

Because many people don't know who the real them really is. How does it look? How does it act? What does it like? Many Christians are trying to become Godly right now, when they never became Godly in the first place. They never died for anyone's sins, not even their own. Their good deeds of sacrifice and service don't impress God one bit---the monk, priest, archbishop, pastor, deacon, prayer warrior, nun, tither, missionary, or even simple Christian.

Some people are religious extremists and will blow themselves up, killing innocent people, for their holiness. Others will pray for an hour 3x a day and fast 5 days a week for theirs. Also, others will bathe in sacred rivers, worship trees, or become devoted to a cult or masonic order for theirs.

Okay, what am I really getting at? It's this, we need God in order to live for God---in order to be holy. IT'S NOT SOMETHING YOU CAN ACCOMPLISH IN AND OF YOURSELF! In order to meet His lofty standard of PERFECTION. In order to truly give Him what He desires from us. See, God is love. I Corinthians 13 makes it pretty clear that, even if we do Godly things, without it being done in HIS DEFINITION of love we're wasting our time. Without God is doing things without His direction and you heeding to His leading through loving obedience. This obedience thing is key. The Bible says, that to God, ...obedience is better than sacrifice... (I Samuel 15:22). Seek to obey what He's telling YOU to do, not so much what every other Christian is doing, even if it's Godly. For example, Hebrews 11 reveals many Christians who God honored for their faith. And each one of them were approved for their specific obedience to what God called THEM to do. None of them followed God quite the same---one may have built an ark in order to save mankind, while another led a nation out of bondage into a promised land. The list goes on and on.

Being overly religious for Godly respect is a waste of time. Those who you impress with "ohs" and "ahs" will rob you of the major and eternal heavenly reward God has for you (Matthew 6). The holiness that God wants to respect is your simple obedience to Him.

The Respect Series 6: "The Genius Factor"

A genius is, basically, known as someone with high intellectual ability. Sometimes, they're often referred to as nerds, geeks, or individuals with top tier IQs. Another labeling for this word is denoting someone as being "smart." This is a bit misleading because smarts are based upon knowledge, and most knowledge has to be learned. In others words, smarts are mainly taught and not automatic. For example, if I begin teaching one individual mathematics (along with test-taking skills) at the age of 3 and another at the age 7, when it comes to a second-grade math exam, which individual do you think will perform better? If they are both age 7 at the present time, the individual who gained knowledge much earlier would perform better and be deemed gifted or smart. The underlying notion associated with smarts or geniusness is them being in high demand. Many corporations want to have someone with genius ability making major decisions for their company. Many educational institutions of higher learning (Princeton, Standford, Harvard, M.I.T, and Yale) prefer having at least a few genius professors on their faculty. The list can go on and on. Like what was stated earlier, they're in demand!

Therefore, many parents want for their children to reach a genius level of intellect, or close to it. They'll pressure their children to study relentlessly, anything less than all "A"s is unacceptable. They'll pressure their children to have no social life, spending much of their time researching and reading. They'll pushed their chidlren to get into the leading colleges matriculating through some of the most difficult majors (astrophysics, histology, and nanotechnology). Once everything is said and done, the child is depleted from seeking to live up to the lofty expectations.

See, the main problem lies in the fact that we believe, "the more intellectual knowledge you possess, the better off in life you'll be." In other words, you'll reach that apex of genius-level respect and be in high demand. But smart people can do awfully dumb things! There is a distinct difference between book knowledge and Godly wisdom. Often, superior book knowledge is used to impress others with information that few people understand. Jesus didn't mainly advocate book knowledge but rather Godly wisdom. Scriptures like I Corinthians 1:19, 27, I Corinthians 3:18-23, and Romans 1:22 reiterate this point. Some of the apostles were even known as unlearned men or uneducated men, and God used them mightily. So much to the point that it baffled the minds of those who were schooled all their lives, they knew that these men had been with Jesus. But true wisdom comes ONLY from God (Proverbs 2:6). In addition, that very wisdom is pure and peaceful, not arrogant, pompous, and seeking to impress others (James 3:17).

The focus I'm getting at is not to denounce learning knowledge, rather it is not to seek knowledge as an avenue for respect. It is not to defined your significance by how much complicated information you may know. None of these things bring about Godly wisdom. And none of these things are the key source of respect. They are just there to make one seem over-impressive and verbally confusing. Gain knowledge, but more importantly seek out Godly wisdom!

The Respect Series 5: "The Family Factor"

Over and over, people want to be esteemed in some sort of manner. They eventually want to gain high praise and elite respect. Some individuals desire to get that respect from their appearance. Others seek for it to come from their monetary status or possessions. While even others feel it is accomplished through their own efforts and abilities in an activity (maybe athletic)or the educational sphere (maybe intellectual invention or discovery). But there are those unique individuals who want it to be AUTOMATIC. They don't really want to have to do too much of anything for it. Actually, to do just nothing would fit extremely well into their plans. You know, to have the wonders of life handed to them on a silver platter. If you're having difficulty understanding what I'm getting at, try these names on for size. The Rockefellers, The Vanderbilts, The Hiltons, The Trumps, The Waltons, The Woodruffs, The Mellons, etc. When we hear names like these, money comes to mind. Not just lots and lots of money, but OLD MONEY. Money that's been around through generations upon generations, from great grandfather to present day child.

And many of the kids that's from this type of 'unearned wealth' feel entitled to respect. Not for their own sakes, but for their family's namesake. For example, Paris Hilton is adored or Kim Kardashian is beloved, not just for their beauty but, for their ultra-wealthy family connections. Really though, should we respect these individuals just for the family they belong to? Even if most of them are spoiled brats, arrogant snobs, or superficial jerks, should we still respect them highly, anyway? Unfortunately, many believe we still should. Many are convinced in their thinking that monetary power and influence trumps everything else.

Well, there are those who may not have come from families with this grand-level of cash-influence. But that doesn't mean they are not still stuck in this rationale of thinking when it comes to respect. Numerous individuals may simply belong to a prestigious pastoral family, family of doctors, family of lawyers, or just a well-known family in the community. These children can still carry on in the same manner of many of the ultra-wealthy, spoiled brats. Or, maybe it's not the children but it's their parents. Some parents could be pushing their children so hard to become famous or ridiculously wealthy that they pressure them to live up to the standards of the ultra-wealthy's spoiled brats, not so much in action, but in attitude. Where kids go around thinking they're the greastest thing walking and everyone else in beneath them. Better yet, those individuals should be serving and catering to their "super-fabolousness."

Regardless of the cause, children or parents, this is a completely flawed way to garner respect. What happens when all the money is eventually squandered or loss? What happens when the family name is no longer sufficient for respect and one is left to face the real world on its terms? Now what? Many times, people spend their entire lives building a name for themselves, even dedicating generations to it. And in an instant flash, one single family member runs their name through the mud, all over the very thing that got the family famous, money. One child feels that they should be receiving more money than the other child, and so on and so forth. Thus, the fight breaks out, and the lawyers are summoned. Therefore, it is easy to see, this is an unwise foundation for your family's significance or respect. How about your family being known for loving people who are in need? Or, they choose to be key in shaping the world for the greater good and, ultimately, GOD'S GLORY! If they were honest and had to admit it, even the children of the ultra-wealthy would respect those individuals much more than they do their own parents. And in many circles, much more than they their own selves.