Jerk Behavior...

As I go throughout life I realize abundant goals, awe-inspiring dreams, and budding potential that is highly reachable. But, there's also another thing I realize more and more along with my life progression. That is the misappropriation of my identity...or in other words, I start to lose myself---getting caught up in prospering pursuits. This idiosyncrasy I refer to as JERK BEHAVIOR!

New Boyz is a jerkin crew and hip-hop/rap duo made up of rappers Earl "Ben J" Benjamin and Dominic "Legacy" Thomas from Hesperia, California. They debuted in summer 2009 with their viral hit, "You're a Jerk", taken from their debut studio album Skinny Jeanz and a Mic, released in September 2009. The song peaked in the top thirty of the Billboard Hot 100, and it was the first song to bring the jerkin' style to the national forefront. ^[1]

Jerkin' or Jerk is a Los Angeles dance movement.^[2] The Jerk movement started in 2008 in Los Angeles and spread across Southern California. Since 2009, jerkin' has gained fans along the West Coast and is gaining popularity on the East Coast.^[3]
The dance itself consists of moving your legs in and out called the "jerk", and doing other moves such as the "reject", "dip", and "pindrop".^[4][5]
Now, I realize that our present day society likes to rephrase things away from their understood meaning. Bad means good. @#!*% means homeboy. Dope means fresh. Stupid means impressive. The funny thing though is you know down deep within that the word is still connected to its root meaning.

As far as I'm concerned, as well as much of society, "Jerk still means jerk!" And, during this past year I have had many episodes of jerk behavior. No, it didn't mean cool or a popular dance move, but it actually meant what it usually means. I was not expressing myself completely in a Godly manner. I'm not going to lie, I have experienced a heap of disappointments, deaths of loved ones, internal hurt, burnout, limitations, physical pain, intense frustration, etc. and it just seemed to hit me all at once. Furthermore, it's like it nearly even climaxed at the beginning of this year...Not a good feeling!

I have to be honest with myself...I was @#!*% ---at myself, at other people, and even pretty mad at life. Unintentionally, I ended up hurting a few people in search of some type of relief from my plight. Since then I have somewhat bounced back from this ordeal and is starting to become again my jubilant self. But, when life comes crashing down on you that's not necessarily a jubilant moment or laughing matter. In addition, when you're the one usually ALWAYS giving out you rarely find others who can put back into you what you've dispersed---comfort, joy, support, etc.---thus it just adds to the problem. Thankfully, I surrendered ALL of it to God and stopped trying to carry it all myself. To make a long story short, I am now at a point in my life where I have to make amends for the damage I caused---even if it was with only a few people.

I have to apologize in speech and action letting them know in no uncertain terms...that I was being a real JERK---with no excuses for it. Oh, what a freeing release to forgive, and make amends (even regardless of the response)! I pray that if you're anything like me you begin doing the same! C'mon, let's get back to our jubilant selves or the best part of us as individuals---ultimately making God look as good as He actually is (in our lives)!
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1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_Boyz
2. http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1615680/20090710/story.jhtml
3. http://www.laweekly.com/2009-08-06/music/we-8217-re-jerkin-8217/
4. http://www.examiner.com/x-971-LA-Pop-Media-Examiner~y2009m7d23-The-Ranger
5. http://news.tubefilter.tv/2009/07/31/skinny-jeans-movement-bringing-jerkin-online/

College Impact

I'm originally from Miami, but live now in the ATL. I was first introduced to Atlanta around my college years while attending Clark Atlanta University. College can become a daunting place for many and it embarks you onto a whole new world. Yep, sex, parties, frats, drugs, and a whole gamut of influential avenues are out there. All one has to do is step out and experiment with just one---it can become a whole world of hurt or burdensome lessons learned the hard way. Regardless of the hype and hard times, college can actually be some of the best years of your life. It's all in your preparation before ever stepping one foot on campus.

Campus life, for most, should just be a reflection of growing experiences within your home. If you were spoiled rotten then you'll become easily disappointed with hard work. If you were lazy the long hours of studying will frustrate you. If you were egotistical then you will pout when professors or resident directors refuse to give you your way. The list can go on and on.

Eventually, you get my drift!

Parents could have dropped the ball in readying you for college. But, there is another side...

Everyone may not be ready for college, but they can become ready for life. If you are a Christian, well, you have tools available to help fix (in your life) what parents may have left undone. You have the AVAILABILITY of direction from the ultimate parent---GOD! He can guide you through every hurt, each pain, obstacles, sleepless nights, starving days, relationship failures, etc. He can even support you through spiteful professors and extremely confusing coursework.

My friend Damian L. Boyd wrote about this dilemma precisely within his new book College Impact: check it out at this site...
http://www.damianlboyd.com

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The Choice is Ours

Many times in life one has to become ever cognizant of the fact that life is full of choices. Life has ups and downs along with neutral moments. Moreover, much of life is filled with precarious decisions that will determine essential things. Yes, many things in life will occur merely from osmosis, but not everything will be an automatic moment totally out of your control. Some things will have the availability for your choice to intervene within the conclusion.

The Bible states, 'I call heaven and earth to witness this day against you that I have set before you life and death, the blessings and the curses; therefore choose life, that you and your descendants may live' from Deuteronomy 30:19 (Amplified Version). A key point God was getting across was that, in life, we DO have a CHOICE. Therefore, we have to share much of the responsibility for our actions. Unfortunately, we can't justifiably live out a life of excuses and expect God to always accept them.

Now, I'm not suggesting that we never face issues or problems that are out of our control. But, God still wants us owning up to what's actually in our control. We may not be responsible for the 90% but we are responsible for the 10%. We may not have initiated the fight but we are responsible for retaliating once the fight has started. We may not have even put ourselves into a particular dreadful situation, but we are responsible for how we're going to get out of the situation. One thing about Adam & Eve is not so much they'd sinned, but convincingly decided to blame the sin away. They blamed each other, the serpent, and even had the audacity to blame God.

Interesting enough, we tend to respond much like Adam and Eve---even while in the 21st century. Rarely do we hear words like, "I admit it was my fault...I take full responsibility for the problem...I'm the one who messed up...I responded wrongly and accept the consequences that must follow!" Rather, we're more apt to blame, spew out excuses, and continuously point fingers at others. One thing about growth, as a Christian, is a new willingness for personal change in behavior---particularly in the area of sin. Before we seek to work on others, we need to be more eager to work on ourselves first. Many people will respect the witness of your life much quicker than the witness of your voice! Let's always remember, the choice is ours and will have the responsibility to change from the inside out (our attitudes, moods, hearts, minds, and perspectives).

The High Road

Boy oh boy, me and some of my fellas' were playing some basketball one weekend not that long ago, and it happened. We got tried...! Yeah, this dude came out of no where and joined our game in a three-on-three match up. So, we went along with it and went to hooping on the b-ball court.

The main problem occurred when 'that dude' started mouthing off like he was grand. Not only that, he began to direct much of the verbiage to me. Despite my size and calmness, it doesn't take too much to rile me up (something God is working on me deeply). Hey, I started mouthing off back at him. As a grown man, I'm not with the bullying. At the moment of things nearing an escalating stage, something happened!

We brought focus back to the basketball game at hand and off of the jerk causing all the ruckus. In other words, we took the high road. The high road is a road less traveled by many and it's sort of similar to the narrow road in Matthew 7:13-14. To be honest, we were on the verge of making a stupid decision and thankfully God brought us back to our senses. We have to be ever cognoscente of the fact that, as Christians, we're "born again---new creations" and the old us has passed away. In other words, we have a new nature that we should be working on implementing and shouldn't be so enticed to revert back to our old nature.

After the basketball incident, we conversed about how the dude was itching for a fight at any cost. He wanted to fight even if he was going to lose. He didn't care. A friend of mine denoted that this individual was being influenced by demons. Also, we became vaguely aware that the situation could have ended up with us getting shot or worse (physically dying)---all over a basketball game. In hindsight, I became more aware of the truth that "hurting people seek to hurt people." See, this individual could have been having a bad day, and it's no telling what kind of devastating issues had just transpired in his life. God noted that the POWER OF LOVE is the greatest healer. It can heal every hurt! Love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8).

The unfortunate thing is that I was reluctant to show love but was more concerned with standing my ground. More important, I know that I'm NOT ALONE in thinking like that. Most men are taught to be macho instead of loving. I know we have always heard the saying, "I'm a lover not a fighter." Many of us should take this more to heart.

Bed of Roses

Ask yourself this question, "What really is life or truly living?"

A many of minds have wrestled with that entire notion. They want to garner the most out of this mundane existence on our planet. They want to reach their fullest potential. The skies' the limit and anything is possible. They grab life by the horns...No, this is not a Longhorn Steakhouse plug, but it is something that's extremely relevant within this world.

So, ask yourself this, "What do I want to get most out of life?" Or, "How do I want my life to count?" Or, "What possibilities do I want my life to give to me?"

You might say to the first question, "whatever I can foster---and a whole lot of it!" These aspirations are all well and good and can bring about an awe-inspiring life. But, just because one has good intentions it doesn't necessarily guarantee you a life that's a 'bed of roses.'

Oh no, I'm about to say that 'W' word...."WORK"...Yes, an awe-inspiring life requires much work. Work on your life...Work on yourself...Work with your relationships to others...Work throughout the day...and so on and so on. Life takes work---and HARD work at that! So, what! This still shouldn't be a deterrent in aggressively going after a desirable and wonderful type of life. You can be better than before. You can be different than your peers. You can open up doors and opportunities for others. You can be Godly! Basically, just know...'Yes, You Can'. President Barack Obama wasn't the first to coin that phrase and I bet you he won't be the last. Let's stop going throughout our lives with a mentality that everything should be easy and changing for the better requires little to no work. It all requires something...we just have to be willing to commit to giving that little extra something.

Dying to Live...!

We all have to be cognizant of the fact that life isn't forever, and one day death may come knocking at our door. But, one's focus shouldn't so much be overwhelmed by the thought of death or it's inevitability. Rather, one's focus should be saturated with life and that abundantly.

So, how does one come to know life in that way-ABUNDANTLY?

Is it through countless parties, a special significant other, downing multiple amounts of booze, or some other vice? Or, is it through centering one's focus around themselves coupled with accomplishments and accolades? Okay, I got it...it must be through accumulating a lot of cash $$$$$.

Unfortunately, neither one of these things bring forth a life that's truly abundant from the inside out.

Only God brings that type of life to a longing soul/heart. He wants you "dying to live"...
As we continue on within this blog, one will eventually find what this whole concept of dying to live fully entails.

Sit back, relax, and enjoy the journey!