The Respect Series 5: "The Family Factor"

Over and over, people want to be esteemed in some sort of manner. They eventually want to gain high praise and elite respect. Some individuals desire to get that respect from their appearance. Others seek for it to come from their monetary status or possessions. While even others feel it is accomplished through their own efforts and abilities in an activity (maybe athletic)or the educational sphere (maybe intellectual invention or discovery). But there are those unique individuals who want it to be AUTOMATIC. They don't really want to have to do too much of anything for it. Actually, to do just nothing would fit extremely well into their plans. You know, to have the wonders of life handed to them on a silver platter. If you're having difficulty understanding what I'm getting at, try these names on for size. The Rockefellers, The Vanderbilts, The Hiltons, The Trumps, The Waltons, The Woodruffs, The Mellons, etc. When we hear names like these, money comes to mind. Not just lots and lots of money, but OLD MONEY. Money that's been around through generations upon generations, from great grandfather to present day child.

And many of the kids that's from this type of 'unearned wealth' feel entitled to respect. Not for their own sakes, but for their family's namesake. For example, Paris Hilton is adored or Kim Kardashian is beloved, not just for their beauty but, for their ultra-wealthy family connections. Really though, should we respect these individuals just for the family they belong to? Even if most of them are spoiled brats, arrogant snobs, or superficial jerks, should we still respect them highly, anyway? Unfortunately, many believe we still should. Many are convinced in their thinking that monetary power and influence trumps everything else.

Well, there are those who may not have come from families with this grand-level of cash-influence. But that doesn't mean they are not still stuck in this rationale of thinking when it comes to respect. Numerous individuals may simply belong to a prestigious pastoral family, family of doctors, family of lawyers, or just a well-known family in the community. These children can still carry on in the same manner of many of the ultra-wealthy, spoiled brats. Or, maybe it's not the children but it's their parents. Some parents could be pushing their children so hard to become famous or ridiculously wealthy that they pressure them to live up to the standards of the ultra-wealthy's spoiled brats, not so much in action, but in attitude. Where kids go around thinking they're the greastest thing walking and everyone else in beneath them. Better yet, those individuals should be serving and catering to their "super-fabolousness."

Regardless of the cause, children or parents, this is a completely flawed way to garner respect. What happens when all the money is eventually squandered or loss? What happens when the family name is no longer sufficient for respect and one is left to face the real world on its terms? Now what? Many times, people spend their entire lives building a name for themselves, even dedicating generations to it. And in an instant flash, one single family member runs their name through the mud, all over the very thing that got the family famous, money. One child feels that they should be receiving more money than the other child, and so on and so forth. Thus, the fight breaks out, and the lawyers are summoned. Therefore, it is easy to see, this is an unwise foundation for your family's significance or respect. How about your family being known for loving people who are in need? Or, they choose to be key in shaping the world for the greater good and, ultimately, GOD'S GLORY! If they were honest and had to admit it, even the children of the ultra-wealthy would respect those individuals much more than they do their own parents. And in many circles, much more than they their own selves.

The Respect Series 4: "The Status Factor"

Most people desire distinguished titles---doctor so and so, vice president of blank, supervisor whoever, director of organization XYZ. Goodness, individuals will go through countless hours of schooling, train rigorously, and deprived themselves of a certain standard of living all in hopes of getting to a select position. Individuals will manipulate others, mistreat people, suck up to leadership, and even sleep around just to gain an upper level status. If that wasn't enough, this has also became the environment of many churches. Some church goers are in sole allegience to their clique. There are those who seek to look as pretty as the pastor's wife and only allow other very attractive people into their circle. Then, the ones closes to the pastor feel more important than the ones not quite as close. The wealthy and educated hang out together like they're in a country club setting, and the poor and depressed get together in their small groups in order to bad mouth the arrogant wealthy and educated. It's NOT hard to notice how ridiculous all of this is!

Some facets of Christian leadership will become highly offended if you don't call them bishop, pastor, reverend, prophet, or apostle so and so. Or, maybe it's their assistants that will carry more of the offence. But Jesus had no problem being referred to as the Son of Man---which denoted Him as an individual without any apparent title. Furthermore, in the Bible, Jesus spoke negatively about religious leaders always needing to be addressed by their titles.

"Everything they do is for show. On their arms they wear extra wide prayer boxes with Scripture verses inside, and they wear robes with extra long tassels. And they love to sit at the head table at banquets and in the seats of honor in the synagogues. They love to receive respectful greetings as they walk in the marketplaces, and to be called 'Rabbi'..." (Matthew 23:5-7) NLT

Many may say, "Hey, that's not me, I don't have a big time title." Okay! But that still doesn't mean you're not trying to gain much respect from your status. Maybe it's how you seek to dress, with fancy clothes and all---your shoes, your watch, etc. are pretty expensive. Or, it could be what your drive, when you pull up in your car, the distinguished label on the front of it speaks highly of you. Yet, it could even be walking into an event or restaurant with that extremely attractive man or woman on your arm. I got it...maybe it's your zip code status. You live in an outstanding school district, in a top tier city, where prices range from $350,000 and up. None of these things should be used to define your status because they can all EASILY CHANGE. Neither should one look to these things for respect. You're more than some over exaggerated title, expensive fashion, a fancy car, a part of an attractive couple, or belonging to a top tier zip code. You're an individual GREATLY LOVED by the Almighty God. Always seek to remember that and leave the Joneses to being the Joneses. And know that you're a special part of something, better yet someone, that's so much greater than any perceived status.

The Respect Series 3: "The Money Factor"

All I is do is win win win, no matter what. Got money on my mind, I can never get enough. And everytime I step up in the building, everybody's hands go up! (And they stay there, and they say yeah! 2X) Cause all I do is win win win. And if you coming in, put your hands in the air, make them stay there.

By now most people would be aware that the lyrics wrote above are the chorus to one of the number one songs in the world. It's called 'All I do is Win' and is produced by DJ Khaled, an ex-radio jockey now famed rapper/producer from Miami, FL. The problem with the overrated lyrics is that in them large sums of money = winning. On the contrary, it's actually not. So many people seem to believe that, if one has a lot of cash, they can't lose. All problems will go away and life will be a walk in the park. Then explain to me this. Why are some of the wealthiest people on the planet so miserable? Why are so many of them still searching for true peace, hope, love, etc? Why do so many of them end up despising the wealth, become hook on drugs, drink huge amounts of alcohol in order to drown away their sorrows and even, at times, commit suicide.

The answer is: because they're not really winning. Many of them just don't want us to know how badly they're losing in life. But what's even more alarming is the great respect given to the wealthy. Even those who may know aren't winning. It's like we're blindsided to the fact and realization of the ridiculous amounts of money No matter how much money one has, there's just certain things money can't do. See, money has limitations. What about the person dying of a tragic disease? How about the individual who lost the family over money? Or the person who feels horrible emotionally, even with loads of cash. Again, the money has limitations. For all it can do, there's much it can't do. So the next time you see or meet an individual with tons of money don't automatically assuming they're winning. And don't give them all of your undying respect. How about this: try getting to know them for who they are, and not so much what they have. 

The Respect Series 2: "The Gorgeous Factor"

Merriam-Webster has defined gorgeous as being beautiful; very attractive. So many people want to be viewed this way, and would do nearly anything to accomplish that feat. You know, many will starve themselves to death until they're only weighing 90lbs. Others would advocate extreme plastic surgery methods, cutting into their nose, sucking tissue away from their stomach, or injecting fluid into their lips and around their eyes. What's even more disturbing, most would spare no expense at doing it. Furthermore, individuals would run multiple miles a day, invest in every diet plan imaginable, and slave over weights and step aerobics in a gym all for beautiful results. It's not that they're doing these things for health reasons, the health aspects are some of the lasts things on their minds and, for many, it's all about the beauty.

It's all about other superficial people showing I value you, not for who you are but, for how you look. See, this becomes a major problem when too much value is placed on being gorgeous. I don't need to tell you all the people who have seen themselves as worthless because of their less-than-stellar appearance. Some have even ended their lives over it! Why? This is so tragic and totally unnecessary. Unfortunately, this is how our world is, and it's not improving anytime soon. For many, image is everything. It is how they validate their shallow existence. It is how they define their perceived significance. It's even how they garner mad respect. Their picture will be posted on a magazine cover, people will try to worship them, and they'll gain an uncanny level of massive fame. I ask again, "Why?" What's so key about the superficial? Why it is so vital? Because, to be painfully honest, it's not!

Over time, looks will change. Muscles that should be stout and strong will start to sag and turn into fat. Glowing radiant beauty will begin to turn into wretched wrinkles. You just don't stay young forever! Moreover, this is not one of the greatest ways to garner TRUE respect. When I see a crippled child, an elderly woman, or a baby with down's syndrome, one thing is clear. THEY ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL! To add to that, so are the people who care for them, and love them regardless of their physical conditions. I can speak from this even from personal experience. This is not just something I 've seen or heard, this is something I know all too well. Many of us may be asleep to this issue, but let's wake up and find that true respect has NOTHING to do with how one physically looks. It's all about who they are on the INSIDE!

The Respect Series 1: "The Gangster Factor"

We embark on the Respect Series by addressing the Gangster, which is known as a wannabe thug, a tough guy/girl, a member of a gang or organized crime unit. So many negative aspects are centered around this word, but it is a word that seemingly vibes for respect. See, if you act gangster or people around you think you're one, they'll be afraid of you. And most individuals respect those they fear. The bully implements this philosophy, sometimes the angry military brat, and company supervisor as well. Some individuals, from low-socioeconomic conditions, feel that this is the primary way of keeping mean people from physically hurting them. The old aged sentiment goes, "If you can't beat them, then join them." Surprisingly, an array of psychological studies have revealed that these are some of the most fearful individuals on the planet. Their identity is found in being on the attack because they're so afraid to be on the defense. When numerous individuals stand up to them, they become baffled on how to react to the unexpected defensive side of the situation. What's more, for Christians, this is the appeal the devil provides. And many Christians buy into it. This is one reason why some Christian youths wear their pants below their bottoms, hold a mean demeanor, and rebel against authority. Being HARD is deemed as being HIP! Again, this is the appeal the devil provides.

I Peter 5:8 denotes the devil as being like a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour. The thing about a roaring lion is that the older and weakly the lion becomes, the more and louder it roars. At this age, the lion really doesn't want a confronting battle to the death, just for one to flee in fear from the intimidating roar. The bible also talks about how demons tremble at the name of Jesus. An all out tedious war is the last thing they want. This is why the fear tactic of intimidation is so effective for people unaware of these conditions. But as Christians, we should let the enemy know that we're ready for an all out battle. We need to put our dukes up and swing away at everything he throws at us. Ephesians 6 talks about our armory, sword, and shield of faith. Also, II Corinthians 10:4-6 tells us how we should casts down evil thoughts.

But the main thing the devil throws at us is an attack on our identity. Each and every single attack on Jesus in Matthew 4 and Luke 4 was an indentity attack. When we know who we are in God, the devil is terrified. Thus, instead of acting gangster, we can operate loving. Instead of being intimidating, we can be meek and humble. Instead of figthing our own battles, we can realize more and more that the battle truly does belong to the Lord---especially our own personal battles. We shouldn't be so much like this world but should take after our father---our Heavenly Father that is. We're respected not for our aggression toward other people, but for our freedom in God. Jesus was taunted on the cross, beat, and rejected, but He's NOW the most respected individual to have ever walked this planet. Remind yourself; He has the final say! Romans 14:11 and Philippians 2:10 indicates that EVERY knee will bow and tongue confess, "Jesus is Lord to the glory of God." So seek to gain your respect from God and not merely people. And remember Romans 12:21, "Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with GOOD!

Upcoming "RESPECT"...

Soon, we will be venturing on throughout the next few months on a new upcoming series. The series will be denoted as "The Respect Series". This will address 7 elements of a topic that is key to the lives of almost every single individual on the planet. Some aspects may seem painful wherein others may be wrote off as being trivial or simply filled with drama. Regardless, these issues are here to stay and what God has done is given us the immense capability to deal with them in a manner that's pleasing to HIM as well as life-transforming for others we face. Everyone in some form or another is looking to be respected. They're looking to be appreciated. They're looking to be recognized and valued in, at least, some small way. It could be on the job, in the home, even in the church, or just generally in life. Christians as well as non-Christians are in desperate need of it. And, there is nothing wrong with giving it. As a matter of fact, most problems in life have some element of disrespect centered around them. Moreover, God has never supported rudeness or disrespect being a rule of thumb for mankind toward one another. But, we all know that He is fixed on the attitude of LOVE being the dominating factor over individual relationships with one another according to what HE considers as the GREATEST COMMANDMENT. So, venture on with me and let's explore this issue of respect or the lack thereof.

@#!*%

When one thinks of the word "HELL" an abundance of views come to mind. Is there actually a place where torment is eternal and pleasure is forsaken? Is there really a devil who leads a host of demon followers? Or, is all this just make-believe? Many individuals would have us believe that any suffering on this earth is equivalent to @#!*% . Many just write off the word as an angry slur or the description of an 103 degree day in a desert oasis. Regardless of what one thinks or seeks for in their own philosophy of the after life, a @#!*% actually does exist. This is no surprise just like it's no new thing to know that a sky exist or the obvious existence of an ocean.

Just because one can try to explain away a specific notion has nothing to do with the existence or lack thereof of the notion. We can't fully understand why the moon is round and the seas are blue but we know that they are. We can't fully explain why women age faster than men and men die quicker than women but we know that they do. We don't necessarily know why the wind blows and the heart pumps at the rate they do but it still continues to happen this way in life. So, just because we don't know fully why @#!*% is the way it is and people who don't surrender to God go there that still doesn't stop it from happening.

Instead of trying to figure everything out we should just live life and realize that many concepts were in function way before we were---including @#!*% . If God has prescribed a plan for avoiding an eternity in @#!*% we should be apt to heed that plan. Better yet, we should be eager to assist others in heeding the plan as well---our family, friends, coworkers, etc. Who today can you assist in heeding God's plan in escaping @#!*% ? You don't need to give them a fire and brimstone sermon but you can live a life before them that makes them curiously desire what you have---that love, joy, and peace!